Starting now until April 2010, you can send me things at this address:

Julie Potyraj
Peace Corps
P.O. Box 50707
Lusaka, Zambia

I would love a note or a picture of a silly thing or an update about how gay marriage is doing.

peace, love, and wow this is real now

julie

Clearly, I love lists. So let’s make a list about things I have to deal with in America that I (hopefully) will not have to deal with in Zambia.

Problem #1: The snow is so deep that my dog will not go outside to pee. We will also probably lose power later because of the amount of snowfall.

Zambia Solution: Zambia does not get snow. I most likely will not own a dog. And I will not have power to begin with. And you can’t lose something that you don’t have.

Problem #2: The washing machine dyed my white tee shirts a nice shade of pink.

Zambia Solution: No washing machines! Plus the added bonus of a good upper body work out any time I want to wash my clothes.

Problem #3: There is nothing to watch on TV.

Zambia Solution: Read a goddamn book by candle light and get over yourself. Verizon Fios on demand? Are you serious?

Problem #4: There’s a line at Target.

Zambia Solution: Capitalism? Chain retail stores? Stuck in line behind a redneck wearing a camouflage hunting jacket? YOU WISH. Try walking 5 miles to buy oil, a baguette, and a bottle of warm coca-cola. How do you like them apples, consumer driven economy?

Problem #5: I don’t have health insurance

Zambia Solution: Western medicine? Try some rhubarb root and a banana leaf wrap.

American life is complicated. Because we make it complicated. I’m not saying African life is easy. But Africa doesn’t have to invent problems to keep themselves entertained. Why are Americans so stressed out anyway? Isn’t there an app for that?

peace, love, and i really am bummed out that my clothes are now pink,

julie

i’m going to miss maryland. yesterday at the sporting goods store, a man wearing a camo name tag and vest asked me if i wanted to buy a camouflage hunting rifle bag. i must admit, the thought of me becoming a big game hunter on the Serengeti crossed my mind. so i came home and googled “big game hunter on the Serengeti” to get costume ideas (clearly), and this picture came up:

and then i decided that I didn’t want to look like that man. and i also realized that i do not like guns, camouflage, or killing things.

so that dream was ruined for me.

as you can tell by this blog post, packing is clearly not going well.

peace, love and i wish ty pennington would extreme home makeover my suitcase,

julie

1) had an epic snowball/nerf gun fight

2) watched a movie about a shoemaker and a drag queen (Kinky Boots, the greatest movie of all time, please check it out)

3) wandered around dc wearing ziplock bags around my feet

4) walked past 2 gay bars and a gay club (all of which were playing lady gaga)

5) sledded down a hill in a trash bag

somehow, i don’t think that any of these experiences are soon to be replicated in zambia. This snow has made my journey to africa seem even less real. Sure, it’s snowing today, but I’ll be in Africa in a week? You might as well say, sure it’s snowing today, but you’ll be feeding cotton candy to unicorns with Santa Claus making ravioli next week! Both are just ridiculous thoughts in my mind. Although, i do love cotton candy. and santa. not so much unicorns.

I suppose all of this is part of the process.

But for now, a poem.

Goodbye DC, my home of 4 years

During which Republicans were my only true fear

I’ve laughed at gay bars

Almost been hit by cars

And cheered for Obamas motorcade

I’ve wasted days

Being so hungover I cant see

I’ve trekked around the city

Monuments, the capitol, and the White House on Penn,

I hope I see you all again

But for now I’ll miss the way the metro looked,

I’ll miss sitting at Kramers eating pie and reading books,

I’ll miss 51st state and country music hour,

I’ll miss toilets and warm showers,

I’ll miss the people (except the lawyers and politicians)

and the way people walk down K street with a mission

Everyone wants to change the world in DC

But in reality, DC has changed me.

peace, love, and i’ll see you another day

signed with love sincerely, julie potyraj

this is where I will be in a week:

I win.

peace, love, and snowpocalypse can’t keep me down!

julie

Which is why my travel plans seem ridiculous to me

February 15th, drive to Philly for pre-departure staging. Okay, totally realistic. I have to check in at 6 pm. I will absolutely be awake by then.

February 16th, pre-departure staging in Philly. We have appointments at a health clinic starting at 8 am. Um… 8 am? Considering I’m not normally awake then, I don’t imagine it’s going to be super enjoyable to be getting stuck with needles at time of day that I didn’t even know existed. But whatever, I’m sure it will be awesome.

February 17th, leave for airport from hotel at 2 am. Ah, honestly, this seems more manageable than the day before. 2 am is like night time, not morning time. So at least I know it exists. We will get to JFK for our 10:30 am flight (hopefully there is no snowpocalypse part 2). From JFK it’s a 15 hour flight to Jo-berg South Africa. From there, a 2 hour flight to Lusaka. I plan on drinking heavily through all of that, in case you were worried Mom.

February 18th, i have no f*ing idea when I will get into Lusaka. Time changes confuse the hell out of me. But apparently, I will be in Zambia on the 18th. Theoretically.

So there you have it. In case you were worried about where I’ll be when, now you know-ish. I’m not really sure what happens after we get into Lusaka. Perhaps we will board a bus. Perhaps we will walk. Perhaps we mount the backs of jungle lions and ride off into the Zambian sunrise (sunset? i have no idea). Ten bucks says we will not get to go to sleep though. Damnit.

Whatever happens, I’m stoked out of my mind (despite my sassy rants).

peace, love, and i’m going to severely need a cigarette after all this traveling,

julie

1) Where will I buy suspenders if my current ones break? Everyone knows my pants don’t stay up by themselves.

2) Will 51st State (my favorite bar in the world) be able to stay in business without my patronage?

3) Are there tattoo parlors anywhere in Central Africa? I’m sure I’ll be jonesin for a new one sometime soon.

4) Normally when I have a bad day, I change my hair color. What will be my new method of coping with stress?

5) Is it really a good idea to put me in the middle of a country full of black men?

6) Say I’m really hungover…where’s my closest water source? Girlfriend is not tryin’ to walk a mile with a bucket after a night of whiskey.

7) I am going to have to wait 2 years until I know the secrets of the island from Lost. And John Locke, wtf?

8 ) Is singing during a bucket shower as satisfying as belting Shania Twain from a warm shower during a snow day? I can’t imagine it is. Man, I feel like a woman.

9) Where will I microwave my Easy Mac?

10) How am I going to learn the dances to Lady Gagas music videos if i cannot a) watch her music videos  b) youtube the dance steps?

11) I am going to miss the resolution of health care reform! (Wait, scratch that. That issue will clearly not be decided in two years if Republicans keep cock blocking it like they have been doing.)

12) I won’t be able to keep up with hipster trends. god knows buffalo plaid will be sooo out by the time i return.

13) Good beer. Does it exist in Zambia? If not, how much will it cost to import it?

14) I will be so far behind on the Jersey Shore. Will the Situation ever find love?! Sami Sweetheart and Ronnie, will they last? Will Snookie ever lose the poof?! I HAVE TO KNOW!

15) Are the lessons I learned from watching Man vs. Wild enough to get me through the jungles of southern Africa?

Only a week to a find an answer to these questions. Dear God, is it enough time?

peace, love, and someone please update me on what happens in lost,

julie